tragical misspellings, emo poetry, and my forgotten career as a writer

i'm in the process of completely overhauling my room. i've donated about 5 bags of shoes and clothing from the age of 12-21. it's taking forever because i somehow found a way to cram stuff into every empty space in my room. last night in a fit of insomnia i started cleaning off my shelves. i discovered my forgotten life as a "prolific writer".

the first thing i read was my marbled notebooks (pink & black) from first grade. i literally laughed out loud at some of the things i wrote. some were for school and some were in my own journals. i also noticed that my drawing skills have not improved much since the age of seven. except i now draw regular star instead of a bunch of the star of david.

the next thing was my "private adventures" the first one dated may 28, 1995. my handwriting and spelling improved a lot. unfortunately, there were only six entries. i have never been able to keep a journal or diary for long. seriously, writing in a blog for a whole month is a true accomplishment on my part.

i then discovered two softcover homemade books. one was entitled "Poems for everyone". I can't figure out when i wrote these but I'd guess between 5th and 6th grade. The handwriting was better, the drawings were still shit. The poems were slightly emo and contradicting. talking about dreams where i'm never lonely and dreaming of "hours of privacy." the other was a dalmatian fabric with an untitled story copyright: 1997. it was a story about kids in florida getting a puppy. I was impressed with my story telling skills. There was a nice about the author in the back with a picture of me probably days before i went into puberty. (i was an early early bloomer). it said:

Bonnquisha Bruchetta (it doesn't actually say that) was born in Washington, D.C. She likes to write about exciting events. She plans on writing about a group of friends and the things they do. ( i totes did that three weeks ago!)

I briefly looked over papers written in 10th and 11th grade, including my attempts at poetry. I only got one C (oh high school), the paper was "well written" but i missed the metaphor completely, whatthe fuckever hester prynne! I think my issues with poetry was i was always trying to rhyme ( apparently at one point i wanted to be a songwriter). but it was funny reading classmates comments. the one thing that i don't understand is, who the hell these depressing love poems were about. then i found stuff about richard rodriguez and i thought NEXTTT!

finally i read my diary, sporadically written in between June 2000 and August 2004. Only 32 pages were written. It ranged from the shallow thoughts of a 13 year old to the critical thoughts of a 17 year old. I wrote hysterical things like, " thanx diary", "no hotties", and "how mature i am now".

i don't know why i completely dropped creative writing when i went to college. i was probably drained from being forced to write terrible poetry and in my stage of wanting to be carrie bradshaw. i found notes on a script i started writing during senior year, unfortunately i can't find the actual script. i think i may start a series of posts of retyping word for word, misspelt or not, some of my amazing finds and my response at age 22.